Women usually complain about having to buy a bathing suit. It’s pretty difficult to find something comfortable and flattering, and we end up as frustrated as a Cathy comic in the dressing room and storm out. I have a similar experience with bra shopping, as well. The last couple of days I’ve noticed something happening to the straps of my standard go-to bras. The elastic is quitting. The straps are beginning to fray. It’s time to go bra shopping. And yes, I’d pretty much rather die.

First of all, there seems to be more than a million different styles, fabrics, clasps, shapes, etc. out there. Guys, you aren’t the only ones overwhelmed when you walk in the back room of Victoria’s Secret. Only instead of being able to just ask a salesperson to pick one out for you, I have to sit there and think to myself, “Is this going to be itchy? uncomfortable? slide around? full coverage vs. demi? padding? nipple coverage? breathability?” and endless other crap things that I have to consider before strapping these things in.

Then I get aggravated at the mere fact that these things really aren’t THAT big and don’t exactly warrant some high-tech device or much of anything at all, yet at the same time I can’t exactly go all ‘women’s lib’ and let them flop around while I reenact some National Geographic photo spread.

And the prices? HOLY CRAP the prices. Why are bras so expensive? Now I am more than willing to invest for quality, especially for something I’d wear daily, but if I’m going to pay $90 for a bra it better be made out of fucking kevlar.

Argh.